Saturday, December 31, 2011

six stringed democracy

what it is: six stringed democracy
where i found it: good old youtube

It's easy to forget that youtube started as a place for people to upload their personal videos. The democratic possibilities of this are kind of mind blowing and here are a few guitar players that most certainly never set foot in a record exec's office to prove it. In my opinion, they are all excellent in different ways for different reasons.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KcnRFAggxmI&feature=relmfu

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lHjMMO3HclU&feature=related

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yWBMGkByZqg

Friday, December 30, 2011

supreme leader

what it is: north korea's new supreme leader/boyscout
where i found it: the local bar

North Korea has a new supreme leader. Someone at a bar last night pointed out to me how much he looks like the boyscout from Up:


Wednesday, December 28, 2011

the screwed up clique

what it is: cough syrup music
where i found it: mr. c smith of houston, texas

DJ screw was a guy who loved codeine cough syrup. In fact, he drank so many gallons of it that he died. Before things got to that point, though, he would sip on a cup of the stuff, round up his crew, record some raps on really shitty equipment and then play it back with the tape player all jammed up so it would sound all stretchy and slow. It sounds like a gimmick, but the beats are good and so are some of the rappers (although some of the time the mic isn't really working too good and it's hard to hear what's going on). The "screwed up clique" were very focused in their topics: cough syrup, driving slow, cough syrup. Since my old friend Mr. C Smith of Houston gave me a mix of this stuff about a decade ago I must have listened to it a thousand times. Now you can too.

get screwed up

Tuesday, December 27, 2011

blogging pays off

what it is: blogging pays off
where i found it: right here

This blogging thing is really starting to pay off. Almost starting to sustain itself even. Last weeks improvised weaponry video post (how to subdue your enemy with a rolled up magazine) is a wonderful example. Far better than what I was going to post about on that day. Just last week I got a package from a nice/evil reader in Amarillo Texas with all of the Herzog/Kinski movies, a Ric Flair Wrestling video, a copy of I am Cuba and a book on the horrifying doings of the Process Church (which I'm trying hard not to read). And then I got some e-mails from Belgium telling me about some Beckett I'd never read and some unusual metal I'd never heard.
And here's yet another good example. Reader C Griffin from the Bronx sent me this. It's an old education manual with an exercise called "ball vs. sausage", which would clearly be seen as highly inappropriate if it were put into practice these days. He sent me PDFs, which were poorly scanned and upside down. I tried to convert them into legible text using google docs, but it got even crazier. In some ways reading it this way is even more fun than reading it upside down and might even be poetic. Here you go:




I. Bail vs. Sausage. Show the child two equal-sized balls uf clay, and sav to him:
If necessary, adjust the amounts uf clay in ‘thc tw-El halts the child agrees that he has just as much claw as vou have. Then sag; to the child:
I om going to roll my clay into a sausage.
Fioll '|rCrur clay into a sausage. Then ask:
Now do you still have just as much clay as I have, or do you have more, or do I have more?
After the chitd responds, say-.
Tell me wlw.
Record the child‘; responses on the Conservation pf Substance response sheet in the appropriate section.
2. Baa‘! vs. Bails. Begin again with two equal-sized balls of clay Ask the child.‘ Do have as much play as I have?
It necugsary, adjust The at clay in the two balls until the child agrees that he has just as much as you have. Then divide your hail into two pieces out of which yrdu Fu-rm two smali-at balls. Ask the child:
Ngw you have just a5 claw; as l have, or do ‘gnu have more, -ur do I have more?
After the chiid responds, say:
TC“ me why. Fleoord the child's responses on the Conservation of Substance response meet in the appropriate section.
-3'. Baa‘! vs. Pancake. Begin again with two equal-sized balls of okay. Ask the child: Do you have just as much olay as have, or do -you have more, or do I have more?
Nuw do you stiil have just as much clay as, I ham;-., or do you have more, or do 1 have more?
After the child responds, say‘.
Tell me why.
‘Renard the chilufs responses on the Conservation of Substance response sh-E:-at in appropriate snactiun.
Submit the Conservation of Substance response sheet together with a report ot about EDD words in which - 2:.
classiiy each child as preoperationel lno conservation responses}, concrete operational lconsistent conservation responses that the child feels must be correctl, or transitional [some conservation and some noncoi-tseruatien re sponsesjl. In your report trot: shoulcl also answer tho two questions that follow,
1. If there were erw noneonsenration responses. why do you think they occurred? 2. If There were conservation responses, do thee reflect err-,r of the ‘feliewing rationales offered be Piaget?

Sunday, December 25, 2011

karmic damage

what it is: a christmas message
where i found it: 2002

Every year I enjoy doing some karmic damage to myself while laughing at this:


Saturday, December 24, 2011

merry christmas from the germs

what it is: germs playing christmas eve eve '79
where i found it: wfmu, the best radio station there is 

If you like the Germs you will like this. Highights include Crash eating a book of matches halfway through the first segment. Happy hollidays.


Friday, December 23, 2011

lagoon music

what it is: hermeto pascoal
where i found it: reader JPW

Reader JPW has sent me so much good stuff, he should just make this his blog. Here we have some amazing footage of everyone's favorite albino Brazillian vituoso. Naked. Playing flute. In a lagoon.

Thursday, December 22, 2011

abstract comics

what it is: abstract comics
where i found it: can't remember

Here's a great blog concerning abstract comics, a genre that is new to me but that seems oddly promising.

http://abstractcomics.blogspot.com/

Wednesday, December 21, 2011

texas punk

what it is: fine examples of texas punk
where i found it: texas, etc.

Texans are serious about their punk, and their heat baked brains have twisted it into some weird varieties. There's a long list of excellent early examples to be rattled off such as the Dicks, the Big Boys, MDC, etc. but below are a couple of the more obscure ones. Special mention here should go to Jim Kieke for being at every single Texas punk show that ever happened (even when he had to work at the library the next day) and videotaping many of them.




This one is kind of late in the game, but it's still pretty good footage:

Tuesday, December 20, 2011

improvised weaponry

what it is: improvised weaponry
where i found it: reader JPW

Particularly notable is the way this guy is able to reestablish his poise in the folding chair after subduing his enemy.

Monday, December 19, 2011

bye bye kim jong il

RIP Kim Jong Il, one of the human race's weirdest, most diabolical and mentally unstable specimens.


Saturday, December 17, 2011

holliday demons

what it is: krampus
where i found it: a party invitation

This week i got invited to a "Krampus party" at a brewery. I figured Krampus was a type of fancy Belgian beer I'd never heard of, but come to find out he's not only a demon, but he's a kind of anti-Santa "celebrated" in Alpine countries that takes naughty children to his cave and kills them and eats them. I'm certainly glad I learned about Krampus as a full grown man. Just look at this fucking guy:











Friday, December 16, 2011

i invoke 1978

what it is: early van halen in store appearance
where i found it: mr. b beatrice of new jersey

This invokes 1978 like nothing I have ever seen.

Thursday, December 15, 2011

odd rituals

what it is: the wettest in the building
where i found it: reader JPW

Two days ago reader JPW sent me a link to this perplexing masterpiece of a video called "she's the wettest in the building". It was only on youtube for about 45 minutes before it was pulled due to the TV in the background of the video with the adult entertainment on it. My passion for excellence in bullcrap lead me to tirelessly search for a re-posting and here it is. Best described in the youtube comments as "the oddest post masturbation ritual I've ever seen".

Wednesday, December 14, 2011

a gremlin

what it is: a gremlin
where i found it: 65th street

I have a lot of respect for whoever has kept this 1974 Gremlin alive and well, especially in New York City.



Tuesday, December 13, 2011

the melvins meet their fate

what it is: cassette destruction!
where i found it: my household

The other day my kid somehow got a hold of one of my old cassettes: my prized worn out copy of the Melvins' first album. I went into the bedroom and he had pulled all the tape out of the shell and strewn it all around the room. "Look it's like Harold and the Purple Crayon!" And I couldn't get mad, because you know what? It did look just like Harold and the Purple Crayon:

Monday, December 12, 2011

hoax?

what it is: beckett meets giant
where i found it: mr. b beatrice of new jersey

This seems like a hoax, but it also seems it could be probable. Apparently, Sameul Beckett used to give Andre the Giant rides to school. It is true that Beckett lived in France and is possible that he liked to vacation in Grenoble, where young Andre lived, but I still find this difficult to believe. Mr. B Beatrice discovered this (one of the 20th centruy's most unlikely and remarkable meetings) in an off handed reference on Andre's Wiki page. No further documentation has been found, making me think it's not a hoax (or else it would be all over the internet).
While Becket is most famous for his plays (Waiting for Godot, etc.) I cannot reccomend his novels highly enough. Very excellent surrealist Irish stuff that gives James Joyce and Flann O'Brien a real run for their money. It takes a minute to get used to his version of reality, but a little patience more than pays off. 

The Giant. All grown up.

Saturday, December 10, 2011

rapist meets racist

what it is: rapist meets racist
where i found it: the morning paper

In the bottom of my bag I came across an old newspaper clipping, which reads:

During a date in Central Park in 2009 with a researcher for the Metropolitan Museum of Art, Mr. Akassy said he saw two racoons attacking a duck near the water where the couple was picnicking. He said he tried to scare the racoons away with rocks and that when he returned, the woman was mad at him, apparently scared that he had left her alone with a black fisherman nearby.

They argued, Mr. Akassy said, because he felt she was being racist and because she did not seem to care that he went to help the duck. 

The woman, whom Mr. Akassy is charged with stalking and harassing, had testified that Mr. Arkassy made unwated advances and yelled inexplicably at her on multiple occasions.

Friday, December 9, 2011

goodbye clive

RIP Clive Robbins


Clive, along with his partner Paul Nordoff, was pretty much the founder of modern music therapy. Clive was an educator, Paul was a superhuman piano improvisor and they developed their model by assiduously documenting their improvisations with severely disabled people. The Nordoff Robbins centers still provide very low cost music therapy for people who need it. Clive was probably the closest thing to a walking fairy tale creature I've met. He also liked to drink wine from a box. One of the good guys.

Thursday, December 8, 2011

powerful wolf shirts

what it is: wolf shirt reviews
where i found it: carl from crown heights

Apparently THIS SHIRT has magical powers. Read the reviews for yourself.

Wednesday, December 7, 2011

trouble, sort of

what it is: trouble (the band), sort of
where i found it: around

Over the past couple of years my band has played a few gigs with the projects formed by ex-members of Trouble. Some are better than others, but I can say that Jeff Olson still plays the drums with the energy of a  raging 15 year old. At any rate, this week I've come across about 35 references to Trouble. I'm not sure what this says about the current state of the universe. I can tell you that in the last leg of Black Flag's life, it's reported that all they listened to in the van was Trouble's Psalm Nine and Black Sabbath's Heaven and Hell. God help us.

See Rollins channel Tarzan.
See Rollins teach a fan who's boss.
See Danzig be a meathead. This is the worst music video I have ever seen. Really.
See Glenn Danzig get taught that he's not a real meathead.

Tuesday, December 6, 2011

the nez

what it is: mike nesmith's solo work
where i found it: clark from pensacola

 
Guess what? Mike Nesmith of the Monkees made a lot of good country albums in the 1970s, teaming up with a fucking fantastic pedal steel player named Red Rhodes. Half the fun is sorting through all of the records these two made together, so I'm not providing any links here. But I do promise to include a little of this on the next mix tape I post (note: since prevented by the FBI).

Other interesting Nesmith facts include:
  • He now hosts think tanks
  • He was an executive producer of Repo Man
  • His mother invented Liquid Paper
  • His last appearance with the Monkees was in a commercial for Kool Aid and Nerf (together?)
  • He started a company that pioneered VHS tapes and home movie viewing
  • In the 1980s there was a Nesmith imposter who successfully conned a number of people and went as far as to do media appearances. He wasn't apprehended until 2009.

Monday, December 5, 2011

amazing machines

what it is: rube goldberg to the nth degree
where i found it: see below


Ruben Garrett Lucius Goldberg

One of my high school physics class assignments was to build a Rube Goldberg machine. That is, a very complex machine that perform a simple task, such as lighting a match. Twenty years later I got an email from one of my old classmates with the below video, showing a most ridiculously elaborate Rube Goldberg machine. The song is not very good, so turn it down and turn up something you like while you watch. In case you're curious, Ruben Goldberg was a cartoonist from the early part of the 20th century who liked to draw up these kind of contraptions, sometimes with a political twist, controversial to the point that his children had to change their names to avoid harassment by the authorities.

Sunday, December 4, 2011

hitting the decks

what it is: disc jockey activities
where i found it: i can't remember

Generally I do not understand how or why DJs have become super celebrities that play to arenas full of people. I keep seeing stuff about Skrillex and that guy that wears the mouse head and all these super DJ people, but when I listen to the music it just sounds like a boring keyboard.

The guy in this video really goes the extra mile, though. This video is pretty crappy quality and cuts between various performances without a lot of flow, but he demonstrates some genuinely good ideas. Picking a rubber band hooked up to the stylus arm is my favorite, but the way he plays along with the toy saxophone player is pretty great too.

Saturday, December 3, 2011

release the fury

what it is: bad behavior
where i found it: see below

Reader JPW was nice enough to reply with this Buddy Rich rant in response to the recent “animal battles” post, showing that perhaps Rich’s internal animal is more ferocious than any muppet. In hearing it I was also reminded of Yngwie Malmsteen’s unkind words to a stewardess who spilled some water on a flight to Tokyo. This version starts with about a minute of Swedish commentary before you get to the good stuff.



Friday, December 2, 2011

RIP ken russell

Ken Russell died earlier this week, a man who made a range of weird and somehow commercially viable movies. Bad examples include Liszt-o-mania (Roger Daltrey starring in the sexually explicit episodes of classical pianist) and the Devils (clergy partaking in orgies). Good examples include Tommy (the Who’s Rock Opera) and Altered States (man combines too much acid and too much isolation tank and devolves into an ape and then a weird fleshy mass).


If you’ve never seen Tommy, you definitely should. It is highly disturbing and includes great performances by Elton John and Eric Clapton, who usually suck beyond belief. Plus, the soundtrack performances are lots better than what’s on the album/radio. Plus, it has Ann Margaret freaking out in a giant mess of mud/wine.


Altered States:


ape
weird fleshy mass


Thursday, December 1, 2011

planking and owling

what it is: planking and owling
where i found it: a badly written newspaper article


A few days ago there was a ¾ page expose in the NY Times about a fad called “planking” (lying face down and having your picture taken). It was not very well explained or documented, and while I threw the article in trash immediately, I found myself wondering about it afterwards. With so much important news in the world, why was so much space relegated to this junk? I did a little more research and it turns out that planking is actually kind of funny and absurd and if the article was not so poorly written (solely focusing on shitty celebrities like the Olson twins and Hugh Hefner’s playmate girlfriend) I would have been more than happy to see so much space allotted to such a blatantly surreal activity. As usual, real people are much better than celebrities and here’s a slew of pictures to prove it.  If you’re really into it, you can look up the Olson Twins website where apparently their fondness for “planking” and “owling” (crouching like an owl and having your photo taken) is documented. I haven’t looked yet.


Wednesday, November 30, 2011

anti-cosmic

what it is: dissection's storm of the light's bane LP
where I found it: the anti-cosmos

For a long time I just assumed that Dissection was another Swedish death metal band trying to be like Entombed. I was wrong. I can't decide what I like most about their Storm of the Light's Bane. It could be the shitty/awesome frozen airbrush-style grim reaper on the cover. It could be the skull stamp on the CD that says “anti-cosmic metal of death”. Maybe it's the commonalities with Mayhem such as murder, suicide, Satan and jail time on the band's resume. More likely it is the overwhelmingly intricate and fast harmony guitars that have a symphonic and dissociative effect and sort of make me feel like I'm floating and getting pounded in the soul at the same time. Sort of like Autopsy, it all sounds kind of straight forward and effortless, but when you try to play any of the parts yourself you realize that these guys are virtuosos hidden behind an ogre's exterior. Despite all of the technicality and well charted composition it really keeps a primitive, driving black energy. How do you do that?


Tuesday, November 29, 2011

animal battles

what it is: buddy rich vs. animal
where I found it: the muppets


Following up from yesterday's post (in terms of both children and wild animals), my kid is absolutely obsessed with Buddy Rich, meaning I've had to watch the Buddy Rich vs. Animal drum battle about ten thousand times. Which is maybe only matched by the Buddy Rich vs. Jerry Lewis drum battle. Things could be much worse. I could have a kid who is obsessed with Barney.






Monday, November 28, 2011

procreation

what it is: kids
where i found it: my loins

Don't have kids unless you're ready to have some wild animals running around your god damned house.

Sunday, November 27, 2011

birth vs. death

what it is: autopsy's severed survival lp
where i found it: long long ago

Mister Reifert, head asteam, firmly ensconced in the Phil Collins, Don Henley, Levon Helm, drummer-singer tradition

Today is my birthday, but instead of writing about birth I'm going to write about death. Death metal, that is.

There are ten thousand old school death metal albums that have fallen by the wayside. For me, Severed Survival is not one of them. Autopsy is one of the few bands that I feel really had soul, like they were born with the heavies it in their bones. Even though some of the riffs are technically difficult and Chris Reifert's drumming is plenty hard to do, there is a looseness to it that keeps any calculation in the backseat. I prefer Severed Survival to their usually-more-cited Mental Funeral because the vocals sound more naturally tortured (less "I am scary" Cookie Monster-like) and to their later poopoo and peepee obsessed releases Shitfun and Urine Junkies (even if they were calling themselves Abscess by that point, it's all the same to me).

This, along with the first Obituary record, still does it for me and seems crucial and heartfelt and, God forbid, fun to listen to. I recommend buying it. There's a new addition with lots of extras and I'm sure old death metal labels could use some help keeping their utilities on.

Mister Refiert, railroadin' with Mister Schuldinger in the early days.

Saturday, November 26, 2011

modern poetry ii

what it is: (a masterpiece of) modern poetry
where i found it: a confusing and intriguing street poster in harlem


Along the same lines as the other modern poetry post from a few days ago (it's been called an "urban operetta"), but far more extraordinary is R. Kelly's Trapped in the Closet serial "drama". You've probably already experienced it, in which case it's time for a reviewing. If you've never seen it please do so at once.

It's easy to write it off as stupid, but the more you watch it, the more it sucks you in. As it evolves, it really exceeds boundaries of definition, taste, humor, musical drama and any other pigeonholes you can think of. At first my wife wanted to murder me because I kept making her watch episode after episode and then she got pulled in too, but then she hated it again, but then she thought it was funny again. And that's kind of how it goes.

I have many thoughts and a rainbow of emotional reactions to this thing, but you should just watch it. All.

Start here

Friday, November 25, 2011

buy nothing day

what it is: today
where i found it: you cannot escape it



I hate crowds. I also have no desire for a flat screen TV. I also can’t afford one, even if it’s on sale for a low, low $1500. I like camping, but not in front of Best Buy. At any rate I’ll hide my laziness and lack of consumer motivation as political conviction, telling you to celebrate Buy Nothing Day.

Thursday, November 24, 2011

happy thanksgiving

To celebrate Thanksgiving here's some far out music from Turkey:

 


Wednesday, November 23, 2011

pepper spray art

what it is: pepper spray art
where i found it: all over the media

You've probably seen this picture of the handcuffed protesters in CA getting sprayed in the face with hot sauce by a nice officer of the law. People sure have been fast in using the image in all kinds of creative ways. In fact this link, which presents a fantastic collection, is 4 or 5 days old. I just can't keep up.

Tuesday, November 22, 2011

modern poetry

what it is: modern poetry
where i found it: "urban radio"

Apparently the music industry is dead. Everyone I know who runs a record label doesn't anymore. Yet somehow rap is still riding high with no regrets. In a lot of ways it's the most audacious, psychedelic and hormone driven stuff out there, sort of like rock and roll used to be. I've had a few favorite asinine "urban radio" hits over the last few years. Here are a few selections:

This is Why I'm Hot
This one gets award for the best logical ourobouros.

This is why I'm Hot:
I'm Hot Because I'm Fly
You Ain't Because You Not
This is why, this is why I'm hot.


Blame it on the A-a-a-a-a-alcohol, Baby
Speaks for itself



Trying to Catch Me Ridin' Dirty
This one was by an artist with the amazing name of Chameleon-aire (get it, like a cross between a chameleon and a millionaire). I don't know what "riding dirty" means. It's something about cruising in a car all high on cough syrup and getting pulled over.

She Wanna Lick Me Like a Lollipop
Kind of speaks for itself, but it should also be mentioned that it seems kind of amazing that the number one hit of the Summer was blatantly about oral sex.

Also by Lil' Wayne, I'm not sure about the title of this one
I'm a Pill Poppin' Animal
A Syrup Sippin' Nigga
I'm So High You Can't Catch Me with a Fucking Antenna

Birthday Sex
Who the hell writes a song called birthday sex? This song seems like it took about four minutes to come up with. Check it out:

It's your birthday so I know
you want to ride out,
Even if we only go to my house
Sip mo- weezy as we sit upon my couch
Feels good, but I know you want to
cry out


You say you want passion
I think you found it
Get ready for action
Don't be astounded
We switchin' positions
You feel surrounded
Just tell me where you want
your gift, girl


Don't need candles or cake
just need your body to make

Birthday sex
Birthday sex 

[It's the best day of the year, girl]

It feels like, feels like...
lemme hit that...g-spot g-spot


We grindin' wit passion, cuz it's yo birthday
Been at it for hours...I know you thirsty
You kiss me so sweetly...taste just like Hershey's
Just tell me how you want yo gift, girl


First I'm gonna take a dive into the water,
deep until I know I pleased that body (body ah oop)
Or girl without a broom
I might just sweep you off your feet


Or maybe we can float on top my water bed,
you close your eyes as i pry between your legs
We work our way from kitchen stoves, and tables
Girl you know I'm more than able to please, yeah
Say you wanted flowers on the bed (on the bed)
But you got me and hours on the bed
(it's the best day of the year, girl)
(lemme know what it feels like, feels like, when I hit that G-spot, G-spot)


This employs one of my favorite lyrical devices: rhyming a word with the same word, somehow increasingly popular as of late. Could he really not think of anything that rhymes with bed?

Irreplaceable
In this break up anthem, Beyonce uses the same lyrical device mentioned above:

You must not know 'bout me
You must not know 'bout me
I could have another you in a minute
And in fact he'll be here in a minute

She also begins the song with the lines

To the left, to the left
Everything you own in a box to the left 
In my closet
Let me call you a cab

This seems inordinately well organized and considerate for such a passionate heartbreak moment. I brought this up at rehearsal shortly after the song was released and the drummer in my band had a good point: In the closet to the left? What ever happened to throwing the shit out the window or burning it?"

Monday, November 21, 2011

psychedelic "productivity"

what it is: psychedelic productivity
where i found it: i didn't, it barely exists (other than on Amon Duul records)

I've have never tried Salvia and don't really even know what it is. It's apparently a legal psychedelic, maybe like smoking banana peels or toothpaste coated cigarettes or whatever other kind of shit that junior high school kids come up with to get high. Obviously it's hallucinogenic and causes marked dissociation. This guy likes to smoke it and try to garden, drive or write letters to Congress. Kind of disturbing to watch, but also sort of funny. 


While we're on this topic, HERE's A LINK to an interview with a woman who appears to be a past psychedelic princess who reigned over a grain silo, but then got in over her head and now is an internet guru.

Saturday, November 19, 2011

lightning rod

what it is: jerry reed's guitar playing
where i found it: mr c. griffin of the bronx


Like pretty much every kid growing up in the 80s, I saw Smoky and the Bandit about 50 times. I knew Jerry Reed as the goofball truck driver. I also vaguely remember some song he sang about alligators. Recently Mr. C Griffin of the Bronx pointed out to me that Reed was also a fantastic guitarist, Chet Atkins' favorite actually. Now I can't stop checking him out. Here's a good example. Lightning Rod:

Friday, November 18, 2011

bye bye munchkin

RIP Karl Slover, the trumpet player from the Wizard of Oz Munchkin band.


 Originally from the Czech Republic, here are the final sentences of his obituary. Welcome to life on Earth.

“In those uninformed days his father tried witch doctor treatments to make him grow,” Mr. Fricke said. Young Karl was immersed in heated oil until his skin blistered and then attached to a stretching machine at a hospital, all in an attempt to make him taller. When he was 9, he was sold by his father to a traveling show in Europe, Mr. Fricke said. Mr. Slover was paid $50 a week for “Oz” and told friends that Toto, Judy Garland’s canine co-star, made more money.

Thursday, November 17, 2011

get 'em

what it is: occupy wall street surge
where i found it: right here in nyc




But here's the part that I don't get. When was the last time you met a rich cop? You are the 99%, fuzz. Aim that megaphone the other way.

Wednesday, November 16, 2011

a family affair

what it is: reverse lip synching (sort of)
where i found it: at work (mishap)

Not long ago I had a music student who wanted to learn the Sly Stone song Family Affair. I went onto youtube and THIS is what I found.

It had me laughing and laughing and laughing, and I figured it was kind of similar to those shreds videos. Months later, through totally different means, I came to find out that this was created by a "band" who has a whole crazy experiential methodology called "the Pure Pleasure Process" for making these kinds of things. Legion of Rock Stars, they're called. Check out this crazy shit.

Tuesday, November 15, 2011

exactly how much time do you have on your hands?

what it is: time consuming extra curricular activities
where i found it:  i cant remember

Here are two examples of people that spend large amounts of time exploring things of negligible importance. Oh, wait, I'm a guy who writes a blog every day about meaningless bull crap. 

1) First up is this guy who writes extensive and well researched academic commentary about the facts that appear on the blackboards in the the backgrounds of porn set in academic environments. Geography, game theory, the proper way to draw a square root sign: nothing is off limits. Despite being porn-centric, he goes to lengths to make sure it's safe for work. Unlike the guy who critiques gay porn interior decorating, which is not safe for any environment (and who you'll have to find your own link to).



2) Next, and totally differently, we have a guy (or guys) who have recreated the Bible with Legos in an extremely detail oriented way. It's worth spending some time on this sight to see just how extensive it is. Find Jesus here.

Monday, November 14, 2011

motivational speaking

what it is: ric flair's motivational messages
where i found it: childhood in the 1980s

A few years ago I read Ric Flair's autobiography and learned a few things. The first was that in his day wrestlers toured the country in sedans, only got five days off a year and often wrestled 2-3 matches per day. The second thing I learned was that Ric Flair's other favorite sport was throwing people off of bridges. Whenever they'd be on the way to a new town they would cruise the outskirts looking for those bridges that guys fish off of (I know you've seen them in your town). Ric would hop out of the car, flip one of the fishermen off the bridge and they'd speed away to the wrestling match.

As a kid I always thought his league was much better and more mystical than Hulk Hogan's and I got a weird and sort of frightened/sordid feeling from the speeches he'd deliver before his bouts. I had to dig through a lot of crap on you tube to find the most exemplary below examples.  Ric "Space Mountain" Flair.







 

 

Saturday, November 12, 2011

mr president?

what it is: amazingly blatant
where i found it: the newspaper

This guy is a real hero. He goes around groping women. He somehow talks his job into paying them off to shut up. Then he claims he doesn't remember them. When they bug him again he gets his lawyer to publicly say that they better be careful because embarrassing things about their past will be dug up and given to the press. And that it's the press's fault for bringing all this up in the first place. And that he wants to be president. And people go for it. As of yesterday he's at the top of the polls. God Bless America.



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Friday, November 11, 2011

numerology

what it is: street numbers
where i found it : around town 

One of my favorite unintentional art forms consists of the way in which people choose to indicate their street addresses. Here are a few recent favorites I've come across: